Making preseason predictions for the NFL is as almost as foolish as it is fun. So here goes. (Win-loss totals are guesstimated. So they won't actually match up properly.)
NFC EAST
DALLAS COWBOYS (11-5)
If it weren't fuckin Tony Romo I'd definitely put money on him to win NFL MVP at 12-1 odds. I wouldn't take Dez Bryant at 2-1 (only because I tend to put big money down if I'm doing single bets, and 2-1 on a future bet ain't worth it), but he'll have supplanted Roy Williams by week 4; if not on the depth chart then certainly in Romo's eyes. DeMarcus Ware is DeMarcus Ware, Jay Ratliff is starting to (deservedly) become a household name, and Mike Jenkins will be soon enough. But that's really all they got on the defensive side of the ball. Plus, Wade Phillips is a clown. But that offense is far too good for this team to not make the playoffs at the very least, if not take the division.
New York Football Giants (10-6)
I'm trying to keep my expectations in check on this team, but it's tough. I'm not Eli Manning's biggest fan by any stretch, but if you pay attention at all you'll know he's damn good. And there's a ton of talent around him, too. Hakeem Nicks is in line for a breakout year, and Steve Smith-12 has proven himself reliable in the truest sense of the word. Ahmad Bradshaw and Brandon Jacobs are both healthy (not the case for either one last year), and should combine for around 2,000 and 20. And as far as I'm concerned last year's defensive output was an aberration, for a number of reasons, and they'll be back this year.
Washington Redskins (8-8)
Since the McNabb trade I've said anything less than 8-8 would be a disappointment, while too much more would be a shock. The more I've thought about it, the more I've realized how optimistic that viewpoint actually is. Donovan McNabb is one of the most underrated players of the last decade, if not all time, but he just isn't that good any more. To go further, Jason Campbell is a better quarterback RIGHT NOW. I'm a huge fan of McNabb, but for every great play he makes, he'll leave you scratching your head twice. I hope I'm wrong.
(Give Jason Campbell this o-line and see how he produces on the field and progresses as a player. In his four years in DC I can think of one or two linemen he played behind who made it a full 16 games in a single season.)
I'm overly optimistic about the running game. I hope a younger, more athletic o-line will work well with Shanahan's run schemes. I hope Portis is healthy enough to stay healthy for 16 games, considering he'll actually have help behind him now. I hope Ryan Torain steps up like I've foreseen in him since he was a senior in college. Odds are all of these things come true, but to a degree much lesser than they need to in order to be a playoff team. Again, I hope I'm wrong.
The defense is as deep as I remember having in quite some time. Haynesworth is happy (enough to keep his mouth relatively shut), the pass rush will be very good (minimizing the negative impact of DeAngelo Fall's gambling)... but no matter how good a defense is, it can't be effective if it's constantly on the field.
Here's to hope and optimism. Oh, and GRAHAM GANO!!!
Philadelphia Eagles (5-11)
I see three wins on their schedule. Three. I gave 'em five 'cause I figure they'll steal one here and there, but I just don't think this team is that good. The defense is a shell of what it used to be. Kolb put up some nice numbers in a couple games last year, but once in a win against the lowly Chiefs, and once in a bad loss to the Saints, and he threw three picks in the game. DeSean Jackson is as great a playmaker as he is a jackass, and he is world class in both. LeSean McCoy is a stud, and will be for the 12 touches/game Andy Reid gives him. Bad news all around.
NFC NORTH
Minnesota Vikings (10-6)
I have them in first because of their defense, but I won't be surprised in the slightest if the Pack finish ahead of 'em. I feel like Favre is the type of guy who will hang on a year too long, and this might be that year. Even if he's as good as he was last year, who's he throwing to? Harvin is having his migraine issues and does anyone really trust newly acquired Javon Walker? (Well, I do, enough to sign him to the fantasy squad -and possibly start him week 1 - at least.) As for Peterson... last year left a bit of a bitter taste in my mouth; I won my championship, but his production declined for the 2nd straight year. Don't let the TDs fool you. This may be due to a negative bias I have, but I don't trust him this year. Not at all.
Green Bay Packers (9-7)
I have them in second because of their defense, I won't be surprised in the slightest if it costs them every single game they lose. Aaron Rodgers is the most physically gifted QB in the NFL (to this day I can't understand how the 9ers passed on him. Someone needs to answer this), Donald Driver is ageless, Greg Jennings is a stud, James Jones and Jordy Nelson might be the best #3/#4 combo there is, and Jermichael Finley is a sweet name (pretty good player, too). I'm not a huge Ryan Grant fan but he's good enough. That defense is just too easy to hang points on.
Detroit Lions (6-10)
They have a few nice pieces on both sides of the ball. Really nice pieces. Doubters of Matt Stafford, you're fools. He's the real deal. Megatron is a BEAST, and Kevin Smith and Jahvid Best will be a really good duo, even though I refuse to believe Best is alive right now. I WATCHED HIM DIE. Anywho... Louis Delmas is a stud. Suh (can't spell his first name from memory yet), is gonna be great immediately. I don't think they'll put it all together until 2011, but they'll scare a bunch of teams - and could steal a game or two and finish with 7-8 wins.
Chicago Bears (4-12)
If you believe in Mike Martz then you might think this is way too low. Of course, Martz was successful with Kurt Warner, who could piss through a Cheerio. Jay Cutler? Not so much. I don't think he throws 26 picks again. I mean, he can't... right? As for the defense, Tommie Harris won't play, Brian Urlacher can't, and Julius Peppers will refuse to. Not good.
NFC SOUTH
Atlanta Falcons (10-6)
I'm really high on Atlanta this year. I wanted to give 'em 12 wins, but I couldn't find all of them. It won't surprise me, though. Michael Turner is healthy, and Matt Ryan is going to have his best year yet. Roddy White will be in Pro-Bowl contention, as will Gonzo of course. Their defense has been really small in recent years, but they've mostly been together for a few years now. Add in Dunta Robinson... I like 'em a lot.
New Orleans Saints (10-6)
I can't help but wonder if 10 wins is too much. Last years title run was a joke - sorry Saints fans, but it's a fact. If Trent Dilfer is the butt of every Super Bowl QB joke, the Saints' defense has to be similarly considered. Giving a defense the 'opportunistic' tag is almost exactly like the 'great personality' tag. The Saints' defense was VERY opportunistic last year. The offense is still a juggernaut so they'll be in contention again... for the division and not much more.
Carolina Panthers (8-8)
They won eight games with JAKE DELHOMME at QB. Matt Moore ain't much, Jimmy Clausen ain't much more, but THEY AIN'T JAKE DELHOMME DEAR GOD. DeAngelo Williams and Jonathan Stewart are easily the best RB duo in the NFL, and Steve Smith-89 is still the real Steve Smith, at least for this year. The defense is kinda sad though, outside of Jon Beason and Chris Gamble. If all goes well they won't have to be on the field for too long.
Tampa Bay Buccaneers (3-13)
Josh Freeman is like a motivated JaMarcus Russell, which makes him a pretty good prospect. But he's very much a prospect. Kellen Winslow should have a big year as his safety blanket (for my fantasy squad). Their two best receivers are Arrelious Benn and Mike Williams, both rookies. And while Cadillac Williams is a serviceable player, he's not much more than that, if he makes it through the season. The defense has a looooooong way to go. One thing they have going for them is possibly the best name in football, Stylez G White.
NFC WEST
San Francisco 49ers (10-6)
If Alex Smith can somehow build on his play from last year, I wouldn't be shocked by 13 wins. Their schedule is that easy. Frank Gore is a stud, and I'm hoping he has a monster year (again, for the fantasy squad). I'll settle for a full 16 games (which probably would translate into a huge year).
Arizona Cardinals (7-9)
This is extremely generous, but I like the defense a lot. DRC is a top 5 corner in the league (maybe top 3), they added Joey Porter to bolster their pass rush, Calais Campbell will continue his upward trend in production. Too bad they didn't keep Karlos Dansby and Antrel Rolle, they could've been an elite unit. No QB could cause some issues, but the o-line could be pretty good, and while I hate him, Beanie Wells is very talented (albeit Charmin soft).
Seattle Seahawks (4-12)
Until I see them play well, I'm not getting anywhere near that bandwagon. I am excited to see if Mike Williams - THAT Mike Williams - can redeem himself. Definitely pulling for that to happen (even if he weren't on the fantasy team).
St Louis Rams (1-15)
I just don't see who they can beat. I like Sam Bradford but he has no protection and nobody to throw to. I don't know what Steven Jackson did to deserve this fate, but it must've been AWFUL.
AFC to come later.
